Avoid misunderstanding: Here are better ways to communicating with people
He is proud!! I overheard my friend talking to someone over the phone. In as much as I was hurt that my friend could be saying that about me I was still not surprised.
I have been tagged proud by so many.
In my second year in the university, I could boast of only just a few friends, I was barely known in my department to talk more of the entire school, unlike some of my mates who had friends in all the departments.
Growing up as a kid, I discovered that I was always tongue-tied and lack words to say when speaking with my peers. While a few felt I was shy, the majority thought I was proud.
I would be surprised and would wish I could speak freely and hold conversations for a long time like my peers. Many times I'll get depressed thinking about my life and I just wished I could be understood. That's just a glimpse of the story of my life,
Looking at my life, I came to the understanding that we condemn and judge people in our minds and sometimes openly, rather than trying to understand their personality and temperament.
We call an individual proud just because of his introverted personality, and we enjoy the company of extroverts because of the atmosphere they carry.
Everything in this world was designed to be interconnected with everything else, including plants and animals, so they cannot function on their own.
Just as insects need flowers to pollinate and plants release oxygen for humans and humans release carbon dioxide for plants, humans are also programmed to relate to each other for a productive life.
But how can we have an effective relationship when there are voids of understanding in the personalities between individuals?
In as much as certain characters such as honesty and selflessness are important in sustaining a healthy relationship, relationships cannot survive without understanding one another's personalities.
The ability to understand people extends beyond a good relationship to a deeper connection (marriage) and even to raising children.
To be able to establish a successful relationship between people, each person must be distinguished by different types of personality traits.
While they are several ways to understanding people, we would talk about some of the easiest ways to understand people to build and sustain relationships.
1. A CLEAR UNDERSTANDING OF YOURSELF
It is impossible to understand the personality of other people without having an in-depth understanding of yourself as an individual.
This is the first and most important step to take in understanding others. One who hasn't understood himself cannot understand others.
Understanding yourself shows you your weakness, what to work on and it also shows you your strengths. Also understanding your temperaments and personality enables you to understand that of others especially if you notice similar traits as yours.
Compassion and empathy can be achieved only if we understand the emotions and pains of others as well as our own. However, nothing can be achieved if we are unaware of ourselves, our thoughts, feelings, and emotions.
2. A COMMUNICATION THAT WORKS
This is one of the easiest and most common means of understanding people. This can be done either by asking questions, listening to the complaints of the individual, allowing individuals to express themselves in a way that suits them.
When dealing with an introvert, it might be difficult to get them to open up, but creating an enticing atmosphere will get them talking. This becomes easy when paying attention and properly understanding their point of view.
So as much as we get them to talk and share their feelings, we must also learn the art of listening.
3. UNDERSTAND BODY LANGUAGE
For an introvert, getting them to talk might be a big task but their body language becomes an easy alternative to understanding them. This could be facial expressions or body movements.
Their reaction when hurtful or positive words are said could serve as a pointer to understanding them. This art requires a lot of observation and consistent practice as the body can also be misunderstood and different individuals react with their bodies to different situations.
4. CHOOSE YOUR WORDS CAREFULLY
It is important to understand that the words we choose to speak can have a great impact on our messages, and the effectiveness with which they are heard by others
Words not properly spoken can give a negative message which might not be your intention. It's important to know how and when to speak your words so that they can have a significant impact.
5. LISTEN WITHOUT JUDGMENT
Our gut instinct is to make judgments about people as soon as we see, hear, or meet them. Especially if it's people we don't like.
For better communication and understanding, we must listen without judging. It may seem hard because of our human nature but training yourself daily to do so would help it be part of you.
You should approach each interaction with an attitude of acceptance, genuineness, and empathy.
While a relationship is important for human survival, many friendships and even marriages have been broken because of a lack of understanding.
Understanding the temperaments ( sanguine, choleric, melancholy, and phlegmatic) of individuals gives you an edge in building a sustainable relationship.
Have you ever been misunderstood due to your temperament and personality? You can share your experiences in the comment section.
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